Well Over-Due, About the Artist

My name is Samantha. The girls of Modified Beauties, The Women of Modification, and one day hopefully Suicide Girls call me "Goblindancer" or "Pickles" as a nick-name. I was born 20 years ago on October 27th 1991, to Carmen and Rusty Peer, my awesome laid-back parents. I have 2 brothers, Kevin and Adam (Below) and 1 sister, Brandy.

Brandy

Adam

Kevin

I am currently studying Art and Biology at Lane C.C. and since I am realistic enough to know I wont make a healthy living off of my Art, I plan to go into their Nursing Program, and possibly study geriatrics medicine, which Brandy introduced to me as a good idea. I am the creation of both of my parents views, mixed with the different personalities of my older siblings who had a great deal of influence on my younger stages of life. Brandy being a go-getter, extremely girly, fun, realistic and smart. Kevin being political and artistic, musically inclined, and very intelligent. And lastly, Adam, being the kind-hearted mechanic with a love for fast cars, beer, and a easy life style, earning every cent he's ever had. My father is a very smart man, real relaxed and realistic, old-time-y, and easily amused. He has been a huge rock in my life, and I don't know what I would do without him. He wasn't very strict when I was growing up, but taught me with the kind words of a friend, without losing his parental influences. He has been a metal fabricator for around 25 or so years, and has been the most supportive of me being an individual with opinions. My mother was the strict one, because she very much wanted me to fear the world, so I wouldn't make mistakes like she had. She is extremely protective, and sweet. Very much also old-time-y, the type of women who cooks for the whole family, takes care of us all, cleans, and then eats herself. I admire her for making everywhere we lived when I was a kid, a home. A place where I felt safe, secure, and loved...including all of my friends. 

I moved out when I turned 18, 2 weeks before I actually walked on my graduation. I lived with Two ex-friends for about a year and a half, when I finally realized how much they took advantage of me. They destroyed most of my nice things when I told them I was moving, and got rid of my two sweet cats, Monster and O'Malley, who I took off the streets, nursed and loved.

Monster

O'malley

Although I miss my cats, and the life I previously had, I have moved up and plan to keep working hard to get what I want out of life. I moved into my own house with my Boyfriend Evan in the beginning of August, and even though things get hard, I love my life. We have a new kitty named Poe, whom we call demon, and we are making a life for ourselves. Ive started college, paid off my cards, and hopefully Fred Meyer will call me soon with my start date, since I was so tired of Safeway, that I just left. No one deserves to be called names, especially because I am quick witted, and viper-tonged.  Holding in everything I have wanted to say, for the simple fact of being professional, was not worth my unhappiness. 

Other than mere experiences, I am an Artist, a Gamer, A Fighter and a Lover. I enjoy many types of music from Trip-Hop to Heavy Metal. I am tattooed and pierced, love people (and hate them at the same time)   I am a Scorpio, and proud of it. My demeanor and countenance, as well as over all outlook is extremely scorpion, water, and fixed. I am generally outgoing, quick witted, and fun to be around. However, my need to brood and have silence and solitude can be daunting to some people and even scare them away. I do need time to think things through, I do ask questions, and I observe closely, even when you don't think I do. If you plan on screwing me over, I'd advise not even taking that chance.. I'm not one to beat around the bush and lie to you. I am a loving and loyal friend, and as long as we're at that point, I'd walk to the ends of the earth for you.

Ten things I like, Picture Show

Note: None of these pictures are mine. These are all images found on google~

First off, this picture is Evan. It is not one of my "ten" things, but its to compare to the second picture, of my favorite guitarist. They look so similar!

This is Charles Hedger, the lead guitarist from cradle of filth, and the single most attractive man I have ever seen. Cradle of filth has been one of my favorite bands for 5-6 years now. They are symphonic black/death metal, and classified by many of my friends as "Metal-rock-opera". Its my dream to meet him. I wonder if my boyfriends resemblance of him is what attracted me at first. Hah!

This photo is David Bowie as "Jareth the Goblin King" from Jim Henson's "The Labyrinth". This has been one of my favorite movies since I was 5. I love the art in it, all the details in the puppets, the masks, everything! David Bowie did an excellent job, though I think we all agree he didnt need such tight leggings... 

Self Explanatory, this is Clay! More specifically Grey or "White" clay. Which is my favorite due to its super soft quality! I love clay. Getting my hands dirty and molding a piece of art is unlike anything else. Ive spent hours just forming it and remolding it without even making a piece, but mainly I make masks. This is absolutely my favorite substance in existence!

These of course are an XBOX 360 and PS3. Two amazing systems with ground breaking graphic design and capability! Although I have been a Nintendo Girl my whole life, these two systems rocked my world. I have both, and play them frequently...At least, when I have the time for it.

This here is a drawing of a tattoo machine. I currently have 7 tattoos, and on Wednesday the 8th, I will be getting my 8th done at black lotus! I love tattoos, not only for their artistic quality, and how they decorate the human body, but their history and meanings for everyone as well. Don't get me wrong, I am sure a lot of people just go pick an image off the "wall" but all of my tattoos have a very deep and spiritual meaning to me.

I love medieval weaponry! I actually have a small collection of weapons at my house. My father started buying them for me when I was like 14 years old. He got my collections of pewter dragons and wizards, bought me glass music boxes and unicorns, and even read me The Lord of the Rings series for a bedtime story. None of my weapons are authentic, of course! I don't have that kind of money...but I'd love to have a Skein Dubh one day.

Octopus, my very most favorite animal! They are very intelligent, and fluid. They can change color and texture on a whim, and can even adapt to new human made elements in their environment without struggle. I love how smooth they feel and how graceful they are when they move about. <3

YUM.

Favorite book series EVER. Also favorite author. Her highlander books are awesome too!

My life force. Unfortunately this addiction began when I was working graveyard. I wish I could let them go, for my health anyway, but they are so delicious and its become part of my daily routine, like, brushing my teeth for instance. Yummy. Helps me focus. Most of my excellent sculptures were made when I was drinking a red-bull.

Machine-operated-hearts

This is Nine Inch Nails music video "Closer" The heart in the video, though I cannot recall from what animal, is hooked up to an actual electric current,with blood flow to make it beat for the video. Check it out! Rad! WARNING: This is a "mature" video and so NOT work safe.

Apparently, a heart will beat with just an electrical current, but you need to switch it on and off for the full effect. Creepy <3

Here is a new machine made at a University to keep a heart beating--->

Science is AMAZING. See, Andy, it IS possible!

Apparently, its not illegal, but extremely frowned upon to hook up a heart just for the hell of it, so videos are hard to find... go figure! One last machine. Of course it's in a hospital..

That heart sure looks unhealthy! Anyway, there you have it! I WILL find the battery one I saw a few months back, and post it later. Enough gore for today..

Hyper-Realism. How dull are you?

Tuesday, Andy assigned us a new project, working with clay (FINALLY!  MY FAVORITE!) Our first piece is to be hyper-realistic, extremely detailed, based on an object we can hold in our hands. At first I was disappointed, because I for one was not, never, going to settle for a boring plain object. Unfortunately, I don't find many easily obtained, cheap, or household items interesting enough to sculpt. Don't get me wrong, I admire people recreating food, its textures and repetitiveness (like a grapefruit or pomegranate) however, those ideas just don't interest me. We've all seen paintings of landscapes, farms, wax fruit, etc. and honestly, its getting damn old. Not to say my idea hasn't been done, surely it has, and most likely has been OVER done, but come on, how many people have an anatomically correct heart just chilling in their living room? Its something only found around Halloween and in scientific figures used in anatomy class. Two girls I witnessed today were doing animal skulls. Now THAT is awesome. How many people have those lying around, and, how many people could execute their shape and structure as well as my peers are? I mean, they are looking really good. Nearly exceptional, and they've just begun! (not to say everyone else isn't doing fantastic, because where as in my opinion many choices are boring, the twist their styles are putting on the objects are wonderful! I am in a class with talented individuals.) Anyway, here's how I began with my heart, which still isn't done. This is the longest amount of time I have actually sat down and worked on a piece (that I recall, I often lose track of time while sculpting). I am in love with this piece already, and it's no where near finished! I have paint plans, display plans, you name it! I am tempted to make a mold, and add more hearts to my final project later this term! We are supposed to show the inside of our object, and today Andy stated that we can change the inside makings of the object as we please (YES!) I have so many ideas! some mechanical, others organic, and I just cant decide! Hopefully it will come to me in a dream, or epiphany tomorrow during my trek around town to pay bills and such before work (at my crummy job..) Anyway, until next post, here is where I am currently at with my sculpture. I am super proud of this!

Let me know what you think!

Sculpture project 1- Wire figures; Common shape/figure

For my first wire figure, I decided to do something people could recognize. The abstract one is proving to be far more difficult for me to come up with, than I ever remember abstract being for me before. I mean, it could be anything, any shape, a mass, a tangled ball of wire or what have you. Yet, I am having artists block. I started with my dragon, which is a small model of what my final project will be, however not nearly as detailed. Andy said on the first day of class, that if we weren't making a mess, and our hands weren't dirty or scarred, that we weren't working hard enough, so here is photographic proof of my work ethic-

Note the blood on my knuckle, that isn't the first OR the last of my cuts from the damn wire. Though I must say, I really enjoy working with it. Its been difficult for me to get the results I want from it, but  I feel that will help me when I actually make a body for my larger piece. The most frustrating  part of this project for me so far has been my cat, Demon. She loves the wire, as its twisting around on the floor while i string it around and around to make the body of the beast, she continuously would grab it, play with it, and even pull it out of my hands. Angry, but not wanting to lock her back in the bathroom and hear her whine, I made her a dorky toy out of wire, seashells and old Christmas ornaments.

Look how cute and calm she is. How was I supposed to know if she was ALLOWED to play with something, that she wouldn't want to. Go figure. So, because of her outrageous amount of energy, here I am at my buddy Rachel's place, working on finishing my piece. Unfortunately, I wonder where and when I will find the idea and the time for the next one...Especially because I work a full day tomorrow, yayyyy... Anyway, here is my work in progress!

Art versus Tables....or something like that.

There was a discussion today in my intro to sculpture class, about sculpture as an art-form, and how more and more it is becoming that fine art furniture is "taking over the scene" so to speak. We spoke of the line between furniture that is merely nice, and as Andy stated "Oh, you added some triangular shaped legs to make it pleasing, but it is still just a table" and artwork made with a function, like a hand that can double as a chair, like the two in my house-(which I didn't make, they are from Indonesia)

The chairs aren't super functional. You wouldn't want to lean back in them, they have no base support and would topple over, and you certainly wouldn't want to bring drunken college friends around. But, again to the main point, Andy stated that "You have a grand, would you buy a sculpture or a new couch?" He personally would by the couch, seeing as he has many pieces of art already, and since he is skilled and has skilled colleagues, can gain more as he pleases. Art trades rock! Though someone in my situation, honestly would want both, but I am happy with putting MY grand into savings or bills or what have you. Anyway, back to my main point. Where is the line drawn exactly? I wanted to enter in deeper into this conversation, ask some questions and build on previous ideas, however even though I am usually a talkative and assertive person, I couldn't get a word in edge wise to some of the women in my classroom, so here I am writing another novel of a story, to get my word out there.

My view is similar to my teachers, this here, (a link to IKEA) is a modernized piece of furniture. It is made for a function, specifically, but was designed in an aesthetically pleasing way, to mock "art" - [IKEA TABLE]  Its got repeating shapes, a sleek color, smooth outer edges, but its just a side table with a removable tray. This next link, is a link to my favorite artists webpage (Mr. H.R. Giger). He stated in one of his books I read last term when doing a paper on he and I as artists, that "Peoples houses are just too small anymore. No one has the space or money for sculpture, so many have turned to functional art. Everyone should have art in their house" or something to that respect. This is one of H.R. Giger's "Tables"[GIGER TABLE]

Now, unlike the previous Ikea table, you removed the class topper to Gigers table, and voila! There is a sculpture. It wouldn't just be three or four odd shaped legs that would fall over, meaningless, its a metal cast alien, super cool! This is where I see a difference. Giger's table is artwork, Ikea's table is a modernized table. Unfortunately, not many people have an eye for art anymore, and anything that is simply pleasing to the eye becomes "art" or, people find certain things like splatters on a canvas art. That's not art, that's a sell out. 

I remember getting into an argument once with an Ex-boyfriend that argued how well he played his video-games, was an art form, just like my sculpture. Those are not the same. Yes, both could be considered a skill, but ANYONE who practices video games can play them well and beat them. Every single person who plays the game will win eventually, have all of the secret awesome items and weapons, etc. Not everyone can draw well, even if they practice.

Like my old teacher James told me when I first started playing with clay, "Sam, it's nice of you to tell people that with practice they will be good artists, but do not tell them they will reach your level. You still have a lot to learn, but you have talent and a creative mind, You'll go very far if you keep practicing. Most people aren't that creative. They don't have an eye for interesting shapes or figures, color combinations, etc." I have seen this to be true. I have ALOT to learn, I need ALOT of practice, especially with how long I've gone without trying to make any art. But at least I know what art is. And, honestly, those who sculpt are the best of the best. Their pieces are slaves to the area, lighting, etc. around them. They can't throw a frame around it and call it segregated. The base, the wall behind it or the scenery all play a part of how "good" it is. And, working with your hands, using traditional methods, turning mud into rock, mixing old world and industrial, that is NOT easy.

So, I urge anyone reading this to take my words into deep consideration. What do YOU think is art, and why? What makes art "good"?

The Misadventures of Mr. Horrible-Man, and Heartless

          This is the wall, now, after the latest argument between Mr. Horrible-man and Heartless. Now before we get into the story of the latest argument, i'll give you a little back story on these two characters. Mr. Horrible-man doesn't quite always live up to his self-proclaimed name. He is a lover at heart, and wishes to remain so, but he can also be as wild as a baited shark in warm, bloody waters. Horrible-man has been through many heartbreaks in his lifetime, which has hit his self-esteem, although he wont admit it. Mr. Horrible-Man was not the "popular" kid in school, as a matter of fact, when he was younger, he had a horrible self image, because of how large he was, which in turn made him workout to better himself, but it never healed his wounded heart. Often left alone to figure out the world himself, he grew slightly jaded to the people and the world around him, justifying his reclusive and introverted nature. Although he never realizes it, he can speak well with people, and make many friends, but when told so, he either doesn't believe it, or doesn't care. He looks to the acceptance and approval of women to fully justify his being, and his happiness, which has started his relationship with Heartless to turn for the worse.

     Now Heartless, on the other hand, is similar but completely different in most respects. She too, was a late bloomer when it came to looks, and she also worked hard to create confidence, and make herself desirable to the opposite sex. However, she is independent, strong-willed, and an extrovert. Heartless is a social being, with lots of great friends and wonderful colleagues, and she needn't gain the justification from a mate or the fact of having one, to justify her own existence on this plane. She is dominant, and likes to believe she is fairly intelligent. She lives on the fact that she doesn't need anyone, but loves having them around, and feels as if she doesn't take them for granted, because she doesn't use them. She works hard, goes to school, and is trying to maintain a balanced life. She wants happiness and fulfillment, she wants a lover who is self-sufficient and a similar thinker. In her past relationships, she has been used, (never abused, because she doesn't put up with that crap) cheated on, lied to, and even verbally broken down about looks or what have you. She isn't quick to trust anyone, and those who break her trust rarely gain it back. 

  Now on to the story-

One fateful day, this last June, Heartless and Mr. Horrible-man met up and fell for each other quickly. Mr. Horrible-man was in great shape, had thick, gorgeous hair, and was into the metal scene. He didn't seem to take shit from anyone, he appeared very confident, and someone who was social and laughed a lot. He was sweet and caring, without a care in the world. Heartless was confident, with a hop in her step and an open heart and mind. She came upon Mr. Horrible man with dark eyes fringed beneath thick lashes, and a smile. Three months later, they moved in together. Not necessarily because they had both thought it out, agreed on it, and figured they could do it fine...but more so because both of their living situations had gone to hell, and they both needed somewhere to go. It seemed easy at the time

    It started with minor arguments of how Mr. Horrible-man needed to clean more, and get more hours at work, because Heartless was so busy with work and school that she barely had the energy to work on the house. It went into Mr. Horrible-man being overly jealous of Heartless' male friends, Heartless still being upset about the house, and how Mr. Horrible-man wasn't contributing enough...to worse. Heartless had found Mr. Horrible-man going though her computer, cell phone, and even her personal journal. This jaded her quite a bit. Unfortunately for Heartless, who was never one to snoop, Mr. Horrible-man's unexplained insecurities caused her to check his cellphone. She had found some incriminating text-messages of his, between him and a girl named Number 1. She was heartbroken at this point. They lived together, and this woman only a few miles away thought he had been single for the last 6 months, and he let her believe so, flirting with her, the whole nine yards. Heartless stepped out of her normal boundaries and talked to Number 1 herself. Not in a bad, angry, type of way, but a softer approach. She had heard everything she needed to know. Mr. Horrible-man came up with 4 different stories, to make up for his obvious folly, which were all lies. Heartless reluctantly forgave him.

   Not a week later, after Mr. Horrible-man had promised he'd never do such again, she saw his message list on a website, still logged in on her computer. She didn't need to read them, but merely the titles, to know he had once again, done what he said he wouldn't. Heartless' trust was completely gone. Horrible, right? Well, once again, he cried, he sobbed, he promised love, and she broke it off with him. But his depression got to her, and she gave him another shot, just to find out he did it again. The pictures between the girls Number 8 and Number 9, and Mr. Horrible man, hurt her the most. But, each time she found another woman, more messages, she got less and less depressed, and more over him, and his lies. Even when caught, he would try to cover up the story. How sad, Heartless only wanted honesty.

   Now after all of this, they still argue over trust. Each at times, wondering why they still give it a shot day to day. Arguing over this and that.. and then the wall. Mr. Horrible man has a disgusting habit of breaking things when he is angry. Do you think this is a red flag? I sure do! So where does one turn when two people live together, and almost all of the love is gone, but neither has any other place to go? Kids, this is why you should never move in with someone you don't completely love, or understand. I see too many people in loveless marriages and unhappy relationships. Be smart, get out of it, find someone that respects you! AND THE DAMN SECURITY DEPOSIT! Poor wall :( 

-Sam